A Question of Words

Wearing this somewhat wacky color combination got me thinking about the comments that I frequently get about my stylistic choices. Many people have remarked that they appreciate my bravery and confidence in wearing whatever I want, and I started to think about what that concept really means. And what I determined is this: it really is just a question of words, specifically the ones that are used by others to describe us, and particularly the ones that can be construed as less-than-flattering. Words are strange things; some can cut to the quick while others have no effect whatsoever.

The choices we all make reflect which words we're okay with having assigned to us, and which we're not. No matter how you dress, some people will like it and some won't; it's just a matter of exactly what your detractors are going to say about you. Everyone at some point in life will be described in less than glowing terms, and so along the way we all develop sensitivity around some of those terms, and resistance to others. And from that perspective, everyone has precisely the same amount of stylistic bravery.

So I thought it'd be an interesting exercise to talk about which (presumably negative) words we don't mind hearing about ourselves and which ones make us cringe, because I thought it would be a way to understand our own choices better, and a way to push our so-called bravery in the direction we want it to go. I'll get us started. I think my style reflects the fact that I would much prefer to be viewed as eccentric or even bizarre rather than unoriginal or boring. I'll take androgynous or even unfeminine over slutty or trashy any day. And I'd much rather someone think I'm completely off my rocker than that I've played it safe. And therein lie the limits of my confidence. Put me in a staid beige pantsuit and just see how brave I am then.

Which negative words sting you and which ones bounce right off? How do your stylistic choices reflect these preferences?

Top: a gift from Sal

Scarf: Promod

Belt: Lazaro

Skirt: Skunkfunk

Leggings: Foot Traffic

Boots: Bata